Thursday 16 June 2016

An open letter to my girly-ness

Dear Girly-ness,

You haven't always been a part of my life, and I'm sorry I openly rejected you for so long as evidently displayed in the picture below. 



 Yeesh, I am really sorry. Wow, are those ghost socks? With brown runners? That tomboy phase lasted just a couple years too long. I was so worried to let you in and embrace you in the Avril Lavigne, Rocket Power, Blink 182 era I grew up in for fear of not being cool. I mean come on-- pink over a plaid tie with a white tank top? PLEASE. Though I'm sure you remember the day I decided my wardrobe would no longer be that of an 8 year old boy's, and the more I let you in, the less I cared about being cool and the more I realized how fun it was to have you around. I'm pretty sure that flower in my hair on the first day of grade 5 caused a few people to faint.

Still, I've recently realized that back when I was 10 wasn't the only time people talked badly about you, and that most of your haters these days are actually other women; women who aren't girly still say you represent self-hate and desperation, being a "slut" *shutter*, and even vanity (I mean come on ladies pick one, do I hate myself or am I obsessed with myself?). I'm not sure why, but it seems like people seem to think that if you're in someone's life, you make them weak, and they're no longer a strong woman who loves herself. Well, I'm all about raising people up these days since I officially became a social worker two days ago, so I thought I'd let you know the ways in which you've made me stronger to help you block out the haters.

I wanted to thank you for teaching me about persistence and hard work. No matter how many times I've made my eyebrows look like rectangles, or how many days my winged eyeliner takes 8 tries, you inspire me to keep trying. The art of makeup has slowly turned into one of my favourite hobbies and interests, and if I wasn't afraid to have my girly-ness, I may have never kept working at getting good at it. Not because I hate myself or want to cover up my appearance, but because I love to enhance my good features, and I know that I'll love the result when I figure it out.

Thank you for teaching me focus, visualization, and organization. For some reason, it's been established that only girly-girls enjoy vision boarding and getting ideas from others. Let's just talk about one of your many brainchildren, Pinterest. People can make fun of women for using it, but it's given me a lot more than something to procrastinate on. It's the most accessible way to make a vision board, store recipes, make fitness and meal plans, budget and plan for decorating my house. It basically helps me adult like every damn day, and I don't use it to covet what other women have, I don't get raging pinterest jealousy (seriously why is that a thing so many people reference?), I use it to get great ideas from other women and I use them to help myself out. If this is how girly girls procrastinate it's no wonder I've been kicking so much ass lately.

Thank you, girly-ness, for giving me confidence. My curiosity about fashion and seasonal trends grows every year, and I am so glad that you also chill with my mom, because that woman had me in all the latest trends the moment I decided wearing girl's clothes wouldn't kill me about ten years ago. Actually any item of clothing I'm complimented on, my mom got it for me. You've touched the many magicians of this world who have helped me learn to dress for my shape, and created the billions of beautiful shoes on this earth for me to wear and eventually fill my 10-foot tall shoe closet with when I'm famous. You've shown me that clothes don't just cover my skin but are a great way for me to express myself and feel great about how I do it. Plus, let's be honest, it's saved me a bit of embarrassment, though I could probably still rock those black ghost socks with brown shoes if I tried. I've never once felt like a follower when I see a trend and decide to be a part of it, I just feel like I'm part of the fun world that is fashion, and I love it. Oh, and thanks for showing me tall girls can wear heels too, despite my fellow women telling me I "didn't need them". They make my legs look AH-mazing-- I need that.

Thanks girly-ness for helping improve my empathy, humility, and friendship. Now that I know what it takes to pick out a cute outfit, or what goes in to getting your make-up and hair on point, I have so much appreciation for when I see the work my fellow women have put in to their appearances. I have never given out as many compliments in my life than I have since I learned about the art of the perfect cut crease eyeshadow and seeing so many women around me pull it off flawlessly. Being girly is a highly-scrutinized thing these days, so if anyone is displaying skills in the girly arts (make-up, fashion, nails, hair, strutting in heels, speaking Tyra), I admire that bravery more than I ever imagined. Being girly is kind of like joining a sub-group of girl that even other girls are quite weird about. Being part of a group of women who other women pick on and regard as dumb and self-obsessed has really made me appreciate all women, girly or not, who feel judged every day, no matter what for. It's taught me to appreciate my fellow women for what makes them who they are, and to be proud of them for being brave and embracing that when they do. You haven't made me a bitch like everyone said you would, you've made me appreciative and caring.

Thank you for teaching me commitment. No matter how stupid, ridiculous, or what a waste of time people say it is, you've kept us girly girls watching America's Next Top Model for 22 cycles and The Kardashians for 12 seasons. Thanks to you I keep my head held high and my phone held close for when I need to text someone about Kim's crying face.

And thank you, girly-ness, for making me happy. You aren't around because I hate myself or because I'm jealous of others or because I want attention from men or because I think I'm the best thing on this planet. You are a part of me because I like you and I want you to be.

Love,

Hannah


There you have it, readers. I've been seeing a lot of hate for the girly girls lately, and I was over it. Obviously Pinterest and The Kardashians haven't saved my life, but liking those things doesn't make me a bad person or a weak woman. Being a bad person would make me a bad person and being a weak woman would make me a weak woman. I love being a girly-girl, I love owning everything pink and sparkly I can get my hands on, and I am a strong, kick ass woman. All at the same time. Thanks for reading this week, leave a comment, suggest a mess, and don't forget to sparkle!

xox


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